Meet The Douche Nozzle: Roger Clemens

I hate Roger Clemens.

This does not put me into a small group - lots of people correctly feel hatred towards this guy. Most of it is because he is so clearly focused on making money, so clearly wound up on what might be steroids but has never been labeled as such, the fact that he names all of his kids with names beginning with the letter K...and of course, how he screwed over Red Sox fans by being fat,m out of shape and then proving it was all laziness by shredding it up for Toronto, the Yankees and the Astros.

In one of my favorite articles of all time, "I hate you, Roger Clemens," Seth Stevenson did as good a job as anyone summing this stuff up.

I'd like to add that it's not just me. Nobody likes you. It's just a matter of degree—of how much we hate you. Personally, I measure my hate in terms of how severely I want you to be injured. Like, I guess I wouldn't want to see you crippled for life, so you couldn't walk anymore. But I really wouldn't mind if you pulled your groin and missed five starts. That's the over-under on my hate.

Therefore, I was thrilled to see todays box score against the White Sox:

Yep, eight runs - sadly, only three earned - in less than two innings. Way to go, douche nozzle!

The schadenfreude is wonderful.