What is wrong with Ben Affleck?

Seriously. Do we need a wellness check?

I think there are lot of folks out there who do NOT like Ben Affleck. I am not one of these people - I think he’s been great in a lot of movies, both as an actor and director. I care not a whit about his personal life, and whether or not he ‘wronged’ Jennifer Garner. Rich celebrities and their love lives are just not something I care at all about.

What I DO care about is when something makes no sense, when perhaps there’s a “joke” that is so unfunny I can’t believe it’s the actual joke, or if something is just … off.

Folks, I give you Mr. Affleck and his Dunkin Donuts commercial campaign.

I’d first love to ask WTF Affleck is doing these at all. He’s generationally wealthy on his own, and he’s married to Jennifer Lopez. I think they just sold one of their many houses for something like $34,000,000. But he’s hyping Dunkin for … reasons. (Those reasons are money!)

But it’s not the fact he’s doing commercials - lots of very, very wealthy people have a hard time turning down easy money, and I get that. But this is just … I’m so confused.

I’ll admit I don’t know who Ice Spice is, nor do I care. She’s saying something about munchkins, which I’ve Googled to learn is the nickname for her fans and god, WHATEVER.

But what is happening with his VOICE? It’s like several octaves deeper than it ever has been, with a much bigger accent. Is this a ‘thing’ or did he fry his voice doing some weird designer drug? Is it funny?

IS IT FUNNY?

Some might argue that the mere fact that I’m thinking and talking about this commercial means the advertising is working. Is it though? Cause, this makes me like Dunkin Donuts less. (And I like Dunkin!) Also, think about how much money they are spending on this ad. Corporations insist that whenever you tax them, they HAVE to pass that money right down to consumers. So, when they fritter away millions on these two for these ads, doesn’t that mean we are all paying for it?

Apparently, they also paid Affleck to direct these monstrosities. Do better, Dunkin.

(Google also suggests Affleck is making fun of bestie Matt Damon here, and that it’s a terrific inside joke. What a lovely thing to insert into a national ad campaign!)

Nah, bro.